This post was actually inspired by this post from the lovely Tarnya who convinced me to rewatch twilight all these years later.
This film turns 10 years old (crazy huh?) next year so when it came around I was pretty young, and pretty impressionable but I was OBSESSED. And when I say obsessed, I don’t just mean that I read the books and watched the films, I knew the names of all the actors, stalked them online, had posters, t shirts, the Twilight craze was, well, crazy all that time ago! But, it wasn’t until I recently rewatched the films that I realised how problematic the relationship of Bella and Edward actually is.
Whilst 9 year old me was in love with the idea of being in love and thought edward’s stalker tendencies were oh-so-romantic, 18 year old me of a 5 year relationship and now engagement, definitely does not. If anything, I find Edward suppppppeeeeer creepy! Like Tarnya pointed out in her post, the guy watches Bella sleep, that’s so weird.
Edward even admits his obsession himself to Bella when he says she’s like his ‘own personal strand of heroin’, yeah, creeeeepy. But my problem is not even the creepy relationship, it’s the romanticisation of the creepy relationship. Like Stephanie Meyer doesn’t only present this as normal, but she presents it as the most amazing relationship you could ever possibly want.
To me, Edward and Bella became ultimate #goals. But, this wasn’t quite like stalking an Instagram couple, the tendencies in their relationship were unhealthy, extremely unhealthy. But I think I really expected those. I expected someone to love me as though they’d been waiting for me for over a century. I expected that deep, passionate, intense and kind of creepy love, because that’s what I was shown ‘love’ to be like. I’m an intense person at the best of times, but the lessons that I took away from Edward and Bella’s relationship were not healthy whatsoever, and their relationship should never have been presented that way.
I mean, when Edward leaves, Bella doesn’t leave the house for godsake. Break ups are painful, but sectioning yourself off the way Bella does in New Moon is just not healthy. You need friends, and food, and you need to not email your boyfriend’s sister’s old email account for comfort, that’s just a bit weird.
So Bella, Stephanie, everyone involved, please stop romanticising this extremely unhealthy relationship. It’s wrong and, frankly, a little scary.
Thanks for reading!